Rosie Tran

Official Page of Comedian Rosie Tran. 

Spanksgiving

Just got back from Indiana, visiting my beau's family. It was fun, learned a lot about him...mostly that his house is super 70's looking. My house used to look like that, but worse. My parents had the deep wood panels on the wall and orange linoleum floors with a fridge that literally would stick closed, and you'd have to pry it open. My dad was SO attached to those ugly wood panels, when we went to re-do the house, he wouldn't let the contractor take it down. Normally, they just tear and down and it's fine. That's it. My dad had them DRYWALL OVER the wood panels. In case the panels ever came back in, we could tear down the drywall. Wow. That is sad, daddy. He really loved those ugly panels? Indiana kinda sucked weather-wise because I was hoping to see some damn snow! All these people from the midwest always talking smack about how L.A. doesn't have no seasons, and I go up there and it felt EXACTLY like L.A. except dreary. I was like WTF? Where is my snow mothafuckas???? Woke up in the middle of the night last night to my little doggy, Mitzy barfing. That was nice, then I stepped in it. That was nicer. This always happens when I put up nice Christmas decorations. She suddenly is all sick and sometimes poops on the Christmas tree base skirt. It's so pretty. It has a pic of santa on it. It's like the LAST thing I want poop on. OMG my house is soo cute for the holidays. I have pet stalkings up, a tree with lights and bulbs, and lights on my bushes with a wreath. I listen to the country stations heavy this time of year b/c they are the only L.A. stations that play the hardcore Christmas music. Screw "Happy Holidays", it's Christmas! I'm not even Christian, and it's Christmas. This has nothing to do with religion, it's just more FUN to sing Christmas songs and get a tree and be festive. I was humming Christmas songs all day yesterday!! Went to Target to stock up on scented pine cones. OHHH HELL YEA! Those are the BEST. Did a show, took my man out on the town, decorated my house, ate chocolate! This is the time of year to gain 5 or 6 pounds. So, you can feel bad about yourself in that slinky New Year's eve dress...Ok, gonna check on my sick pooch...